Deciphering Cody Jargon

Parents of children with ASD become very good at solving puzzles and interpreting conversations, whether we like it or not. In fact, I wonder if anyone has ever done a study to see if parents of autistic kids get Alzheimer's? I bet the numbers would be extremely low, due to the fact that our brains are working puzzles ALL THE DAMN TIME. Allow me to enlighten you.

Below are a few examples of my son's, shall we say, inarticulate sentences:

Cody said, "We can do double A after TURN."

What he really meant was... I want to listen to my iPod when I get home from TURN (his day program).

Get it? Double A = AA = AA batteries and iPods need to be charged! (If I was on Jeopardy and there was a category for crap brainteasers like this, I'd kick ass.)


Cody said, "That was the slowest girl I've ever heard."

What he meant was... That girl talked really slow.


Cody said, "I see what I was thinkin'. Do people see what they think?"

What he really meant...Oh! I get it.


Cody said, "I wish I could, but I don't have any money."

What he's trying to say, in a polite way is... NO! Now shut up about it and leave me alone.


and, my personal favorite ( He honestly said this. I can't make this stuff up.)...


"You smell like a bird dad. The kind you step on."


What he meant...You smell like bird sh#t dad."